Peace and Strife

"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch)
05/18/2020 at 12:37 • Filed to: rants

I was able to get out of town to one of my happy places this weekend. On sunday I got to lie on the raft that was up against the shore are the water lapped against it while the sun made the mid 60's feel perfect.

I took a 10 minute video while I layed there semi asleep and I thought I would share. It came in handy last night as all my anxiety came back all at once and then some. I had a meeting with the family about the place I stayed and I realized that while my wife and I did a ton of work to clean the place up and get it ready...the way my family is o perating under these “yellow” conditions pretty much exclude me from actually using it this summer. It was a major punch to the dick.

Basically they are going to treat the place as normal, while I can’t, both internally and by job requirement . I’ m also super worried that since literally no one up there is taking this seriously and the population is about to surge from 5,000 to 50,000 that it’ s going to be virus city and basically close the place down completely. The state park in 2019 (the marina) shower 520,000 visitors. That’ s just people using the marina. It’ s going to be crazy town and no one in town is following the rules...even the people compelled to. The big grocery store in town isn’t setting up social distancing, the workers aren’t wearing masks, there is no sanitization stations. ZERO efforts, and it’ s a requirement. There was a group of 50 people waiting outside the local burger joint no social distancing, no masks.

I don’t mind telling you all mostly because you can’t not hear me out , that I’ m super anxious and stressed about being one of the few people that seems to think these recommendations are important. It sucks to tell my kids they can’t hang out with their friends and cousins and grandparents. It sucks for me to not being to hang out with my family. It REALLY sucks to do all that and be seen as the troublesome oddball that has to defend policies I hate following . The whole state is acting like it’ s NBD and I can’t figure out where I am supposed to be.

As I was not sleeping with this, the wind started ripping at my house, like 50 mph gusts. We haven’t had rain in about a month so it’ s been distressing. So I put my headphones in and put this little video on and put my head down and I finally calmed down and fell asleep.

DISCUSSION (19)

shop-teacher > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 12:46

I’m sorry to hear that. I wish I could offer some sort of advice or comfort or .. something.

HammerheadFistpunch > shop-teacher
05/18/2020 at 12:48

just being able to vent helps. So thanks for reading.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 12:48

We’re in a similar situation with a pregnant daughter in Logan who is due in July and this contagion has been mutated into an ugly political fake binary where the anti-maskers and anti-vaxers dare the rest of us to wis h the contagion upon them. So ugly. In the end, all you can do is cling to your personal integrity and exercise your agency and do what you think is best for your immediate family.

HammerheadFistpunch > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo
05/18/2020 at 12:50

Logan is going to feel the hit if Garden city go nuts. Hopefully Im wrong

The Snowman > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 12:52

TRUMP 2020!!!!! Open everything!!!!

On a serious note I am quite happy the Mormon church hasn't started Sunday service back up.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 12:53

She is being cautious. We are hoping to visit there in June... We will bring our masks and stay six feet away from everyone, probably including our daughter and our son-in-law.

DAWRX - The Herb Strikes Back > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 12:55

I feel you, friend. I’m struggling with this exact scenario a lot too. While people at the grocery store seem to be taking things seriously ( about 9 out of 10 wearing masks and keeping distance) people in other places are not.

For example, t he city park I park at to access one of my favorite trails has an exercise group that very regularly meets there mornings and evenings. They are at most 3 feet apart, sharing mats and equipment, and last time I was there they literally had their exercise stuff strewn across the whole access path from the sidewalk to the parking lot. No way to go around unless you want to go through grass. I cycled over to a different more “ well known” trail system. And I saw more people on it than I ever have on a mtb trail in my whole life. Even more than demo days. Like several families riding together. Also lots of newbies not wearing helmets but that’s a whole other conversation.

And the part that makes it all the harder is that I want to see my friends and family like all these other people. And to be fair to them, every level of government is collectively shrugging their shoulders at defining what is truly safe. I’m going to have to determine for myself when I “feel” safe to do that. Is July going to “feel”more safe than now? This thing will still be out there chewing through the population then. I have several high risk friends...my parents are older and my mom especially is high risk. I don’t want to be a disease vector. I don’t want something to happen and have that nagging thought for the rest of my life of “did I spread it, was it me?”. At what point does “I need to live my life” t rump “I need to protect the lives of others”?

TheRealBicycleBuck > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 12:58

We were the only family in our graduation group that were wearing masks yesterday. Thankfully, the school was enforcing social distancing protocol, but the state is preparing to lift those soon. Frankly, I’m starting to think that my daughter needs to get exposed so she’s at home when she’s sick instead of 500 miles away at college. It’s a scary to think of her being far from home if/when she catches it.

HammerheadFistpunch > DAWRX - The Herb Strikes Back
05/18/2020 at 12:59

This middle ground is worse than being told to lock up, for me at least.

Cash Rewards > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 13:00

I definitely feel where you’re coming from. Our town fair was supposed to be this week. Fourth of July fireworks are set off 3 blocks from our house: cancelled. Last year was our first year getting into the swim club after a 6 year wait: kids loved it. Telling them they can’t do all the fun things they look forward to sucks, and sucks hard.

ZHP Sparky, the 5th > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 13:13

That’s truly a horrible place to be. And agreed that this middle ground is so much worse. My wife in particular is having a rough time, for good reason - she’s been stuck home for 2 months straight, quite literally, with a 2 year old. I tell her how packed everything is the few times I venture out to pick up groceries, etc and we can’t even reconcile our reality vs that . I get the feeling over the next few months its going to be really trying - numbers are going to keep skyrocketing, but people around us are already resuming “normal” activity simply because they’re bored with not doing it.

Feels like we’re being gaslit already - as if staying home and limiting exposure is just something we are doing because we’re being overly cautious, and not what we are all SUPPOSED to do...while a ton of people go back to socializing and eating out. We have zero support system, just the 3 of us and cannot afford to risk falling sick - even if one of us does, it’ll be super difficult for the other two even if we are relatively low on the at risk charts.

At the same time thankful to have a 2 year old - she doesn’t know what’s going on and visiting the outside world isn’t even a concept she thinks about anymore (as sad as that is). Having older kids and telling them no when all their friends and family are out there having fun, must be so much harder - just know you’re doing the right thing.

ClassicDatsunDebate > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 13:16

You’re not alone. It’s hard to know where that sweet spot is. We’re still very cautious because of elderly family and people with health concerns but were starting to expand our social bubble slowly.

I guess I’m lucky compared to you in that the majority of people here in BC are behind the whole social distancing stuff and are cooperating therefor I have more control on the process of easing restrictions....as opposed to getting it forced on me.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 13:19

My thought is that we have to find a way to move forward while still being cautious. We are going to be living with this virus in our midst without a vaccine or cure for at least the rest of 2020, if not most of ‘21. In my mind, getting together with your parents is doable, if you do it right. Seeing them in a park on a nice day, kicking a soccer ball around, and setting lawn chairs up a decent distance away from each other to have a nice chat seems like one way. Seeing each other and not hugging your family is hard, but you can do it.

dumpsterfire! > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 13:34

Purgatory Summer 2020 has already played a big mind-fuck on most people who don't mainline Fox news. The not knowing and filling the 24hour news cycle with all things Covid has scrambled reality.

DipodomysDeserti > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 13:59

Godspeed.

The only thing keeping me sane right now are my friends and family. We’re all pretty much in the middle ground. My sister, the nurse, is probably the most “fuck it, people die of shit all the time” one of us. She’s seen this thing first hand, and isn’t too alarmed.

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > HammerheadFistpunch
05/18/2020 at 14:46

Similar boat. My grandparents had a summer house in similar area. I’ve been to the local hospital and in precovid days was substanially understaffed for the loads caused influx of summer residents/tourists.

as far as family, have a couple cousins and uncle that never started social distancing let alone stopped. Week and half ago t hey were talking about their memorial Day bbq/pool party. My parents, siblings, and myself are the asshole for not being enthusiastic and declining . Did no one read the phases opening? People got a date stuck in their head, and zoned out of all the information following that.

Nom De Plume > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/18/2020 at 15:30

Depends on the college and even more on the hospital she’d land in. I’d say she will not be attending in person this Fall so mostly a non-issue.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Nom De Plume
05/18/2020 at 15:41

You may be right. We’re waiting for the college to make that decision, but planning for her to leave in the fall. We’re fortunate that we have family in the area who are more than willing to lend a hand. But I know my wife and she will hop in the car as soon as our daughter falls ill. That means I’ll end up with at least two family members falling ill at the same time.

Nom De Plume > HammerheadFistpunch
05/19/2020 at 22:41

I’ve been resisting impacting your actions by commenting. Things came to a head for me this evening.

Stay strong and keep your hands soft is all I can suggest might help weather dismissal of how you lead your family.